hard to put into words, but i will try. 

as soon as our feet hit the ground in the 'tent city' which seemed more like an apocalyptic junk yard, a little girl came up to me and held out her hand. i'm not sure if she lived in the rusted car she stood near, but nevertheless, she waited for me to respond. it was decision time. do i grab her hand, knowing i haven't completed my typhoid vaccination or do i politely distract her towards something or someone else? 

when i grabbed her hand it was like i had jumped over an invisible wall, and quickly picked her up to give her the embrace that she deserves. 

soon after we began handing out 'feed my starving children' food. when everyone is hungry, you can imagine things can get ugly pretty quick. we walked the food to their tents (homes) and tried to give food only to the parents, but that wasn't always possible. we had a couple scary moments where suddenly kev and i were outnumbered by hungry hatians, and we had to decide who was the 'best' person to give the food to. it was an artificial, unnatural place of power that felt wrong. 

after that, we pulled out the box drum and guitars, threw a 2x4 on the ground to symbolize a no pass zone, and did a few worship songs. the kids clapped and sang and smiled. what if we had stayed home?

Lord, you give each of us the strength to make it through the day. give us enough energy to see these people the way you do always, and to love them the way you love us. Amen. 

(dave holvig)

journal day 1